Brunilda migrated to New York City at the tender age of twenty-four. She met a man who spoke her language and quickly fell in love. Four months into the relationship, she realized she was pregnant and uncovered her boyfriend had a wife. Determined to end the pregnancy, she visited several doctors, and no one would terminate pregnancy given she was too far along. Out of desperation, she visited one last doctor, who happened to be Haitian. Dr. Pierre inquired why she wanted to end the pregnancy. Brunilda explained how she had just arrived in the country alone and learned her boyfriend of four months lied about his status and is married. Brunilda felt hopeless. Dr. Pierre told Brunilda if she had no financial support, he would financially support her and the unborn child. Dr. Pierre was the catalyst in the birth of the child. Once the baby was born, Brunilda’s boyfriend migrated back to D.R. to be with his wife and family. Brunilda spiraled into a deep depression gaining one hundred and fifty pounds. The boyfriend encouraged her to have weight loss surgery for health reasons. Being involved with a married man meant she went months without seeing him since his wife lived in another country. Brunilda spent six months with her boyfriend then he would return to his wife for the remaining six months. Once the boyfriend was able to bring his wife to America, they settled into an apartment building. Brunilda was rampant with rage and repeatedly called the wife to chastise her. When Brunilda grew tired of harassing the wife, things escalated. Brunilda moved into the same building as her lover and his wife. Brunilda demanded sex daily with her boyfriend. On one occasion, the boyfriend denied Brunilda sex, she broke into his apartment and stabbed the mattress fifty times, she was never denied again. Brunilda constantly thought of ways to torment the wife. The wife finally mustered up the courage to tell Brunilda she was never leaving her husband, Brunilda replies neither was she. The rivalry lasted twenty-five years until the husband decides to sleep with his wife’s best friend.
Poly Solo
I met Tabitha at a Labor Day party. She was very ingratiating. Tabitha immediately disclosed how she just purchased a sex toy, with a tongue attached to a suction device and how it is everything she requires in life. She goes on to share how she is Poly Solo. Poly Solo meaning many loves with emotional attachment although not having a primary partner. Tabitha equates having lovers too caring for plants, given each plant requires a different level of care. For example, some plants required very little water, while others require water three times per week. Some thrive in the sun, while others are best suited with indirect sunlight. She speaks of requiring substantial solitary time in order to show up in the world at her very best. Tabitha is keen on identifying precisely the needs of her lovers while ensuring her wants are met. She has a lover who requires nurturing once a month and happily, she obliges. She mentioned how she was involved with a married couple and enjoyed being intimate with the husband and how it was mutual. The husband asked if she was interested in a relationship independent of his wife, given they have an open marriage. The wife propositioned the exact scenario as the husband, although Tabitha found the wife extremely aggressive and opted not to engage exclusively with the wife. Overall, Tabitha said being the unicorn/third party in a marriage can be prickly. According to Tabitha, the downside of polyamory is falling in love with a partner and things suddenly ending and left with the task of picking up the pieces.
As a point of reference, Tabitha mentions a beloved girlfriend who is 87 and polyamorous. Her dear friend purchased a brownstone in the 1980s, moved in her besties into three apartments along with renting the additional units to single mothers along with families, and how it is a loving community, in which everyone looks out and cares for one another. The elders in the brownstone, occasionally provide childcare for the other tenants, while maintaining multiple lovers.
Tabitha likens being married to being taken for granted, overlooked, dismissed, and disregarded. She prefers to be desired and lusted over than be confined by societal norms.about:blank